


Among the Redwoods

by onlyasdark



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:49:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27196066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlyasdark/pseuds/onlyasdark
Summary: Dani's fourth grade class visits Big Sur where Jamie works as a park ranger.
Relationships: Dani Clayton/Jamie, Hannah Grose/Owen Sharma
Comments: 33
Kudos: 354





	1. Arrival

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! 
> 
> I've been thinking about Dani and Jamie a lot and figured I'd finally put something on paper. It won't be perfect and logistically, some things may not make sense... but I hope you'll forgive me. :) This will be a relatively fluffy couple of chapters and I'll be posting chapter 2 in the next day or so. I have a pretty rough outline done but if you have any suggestions, I'm always open to hearing them. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

She loves mornings.

Especially these mornings, the mornings when the fog rolls over the ocean and onto the coast, covering the grassy hills with a thin layer of cloud.

The mornings when the ancient redwoods seem redder and taller than usual, and she feels smaller.

It’s in the mornings that the white and purple wildflowers rise to meet the sun. It’s quiet, just how she likes it. Quiet enough to hear the blue jays singing and see the Pelicans catching breakfast offshore.

Shortly, just within the next couple of hours, people from all over the state, all over the country, all over the world even, will wander into her park.

Their voices loud and inconsiderate, will carry and carry, and scare away all the little critters Jamie has come to love. She doesn’t like most humans but she's not callous enough to think them all bad. Not yet, anyway. She knows there are people like her. People who make sure to bring an extra bag to pick up trash and grimace at stomped down wildflowers. The people who want to leave the untouched wilderness as it is, as it should be.

Kids, however moldable their minds are, curious and unrestrained, make her nervous. She’s been anxious for days in anticipation of hell week, as it has become known among the park staff.

Soon, hundreds of middle school aged children from Monterey will descend on the park. It could very well be madness, depending on the lot. She’s had her fair share of hell weeks over the years but sometimes the kids surprise her. More and more of them, having grown up in a state where wildfires now regularly burn down towns and hundreds of thousands of acres of wilderness, understand something is very wrong. 

She’s found, if you plant the seed early enough, even the ones who aren’t as interested at first end up leaving wanting to defend what’s left of the natural world. 

It's one of the many, many reasons she loves this job. 

././.

Each park ranger was assigned to a class the week prior. As head ranger, Jamie may have perhaps rigged the results to ensure that Hannah Grose’s class was hers. They met last year when Hannah’s class was assigned to her by chance and have since gotten to know each other well.

Despite the busy schedule she keeps to, Hannah visits the park often. Jamie has a nagging suspicion that her frequent returns over the last several months may have something to do with a certain bespectacled park cook.

Looking at the class list, Jamie sees that joining Hannah are two parent volunteers and someone Jamie does not recognize – Dani Clayton.

Her name unfamiliar, Jamie decides she must be new.

She greets some of the other park rangers, ignores Peter Quint, and impatiently awaits the arrival of the yellow school buses, which are now several minutes late. She’s eager to get started, eager to show off her favorite trails to a willing audience. 

When the buses finally arrive, she locates hers quickly. The children wave at her from the windows, their excitement infectious.

It’s then that she sees Hannah stepping off the bus, her teeth gleaming. She's not alone, there’s a woman behind her. Younger. Closer to Jamie’s age.

She’s pretty. Painfully pretty and all smiles as she steps off the bus and looks around. Finding it to her liking, she throws her arms out and inhales deeply.

Their eyes meet briefly – or rather, she catches Jamie starring – and all too soon Hannah’s hugging her. 

“Jamie!” Hannah exclaims and Jamie tears her gaze away from the woman who, by process of elimination, must be Dani Clayton. 

She embraces Hannah warmly and she means it when she says: "It's so good to see you."

././

Dani’s never been to Big Sur.

She’s seen the ocean and the coast from Monterey, of course – still hasn’t gotten used to its beauty, of course – but hasn’t had the chance to venture the 30 miles or so south in the few months she’s been in California. She had been busy trying to find a job, then nannying for a wealthy family and now, finally, teaching. 

It was a bit intimidating starting a new when most staffers already knew each other. They were all nice enough, greeting her, and offering to show her around town but it was Hannah who came to sit with her in the staff room on her first day.

Since, they shared tea often – which Hannah insisted on making every time – and make small talk. Sometimes they sit together in silence as Dani fiddles with her phone and Hannah reads a book. She's an easy presence and Dani is grateful for it, though they have yet to spend time together outside of work. So when Hannah mentioned a week-long field trip, Dani naturally jumped at the occasion. 

Hannah could have asked anyone but she asked Dani. And Dani hoped it meant the British woman actually enjoyed her presence too.

Even from the park headquarters parking lot, she can smell the trees, wet from yesterday’s rain. She feels the ocean breeze on her face and closes her eyes, inhaling deeply.

When she opens them, she’s making eye contact with one of the park rangers. The girl – woman, really – has soft brown curls falling down her face and curious eyes.

Hannah mentioned a friend on the bus ride over.

Jamie.

_A little rough around the edges but kind. You’ll like her._

Dani is sure she’s never seen Jamie before, she’s sure of it. And yet, she can’t shake the feeling there’s something familiar about her. Dani can't look away and it isn't until Hannah's hugging the woman that the trance is over and Dani, no longer stuck in place, can finally make her way over. 

“Your favorite cook should be dropping by in three, two – ” She hears as she approaches. 

“Oh, stop it.” Hannah replies bashfully, hitting Jamie slightly on the shoulder. 

As if on cue, from the doors of the Lodge, a handsome man with a mustache bursts through. He jogs toward them, his apron still on and waves a wooden spoon he clearly forgot to put down in his haste. 

“Miss Grose.” Smile glued to his face, he sweeps Hannah into a hug and nearly off her feet. She laughs, falling into his embrace. There’s a lightness to her Dani hasn’t seen at school and she suddenly feels like she’s intruding on something private.

Hannah’s never mentioned a boyfriend. Never mentioned dating in general. She mentioned an ex-husband, one she left England to escape but didn’t go further into details, and Dani didn’t want to push her.

The ranger, dressed from head to toe in green, no doubt wanting to give Owen and Hannah some privacy turns to her and Dani can’t help the nervous feeling bubbling in her stomach.

“$10 says they finally seal the deal by the end of the trip.”

Not hi, not hello, not nice to meet you. Dani laughs, trying to hide the fact that Jamie British accent somehow makes her all the more attractive and trying to ignore the little voice inside her head wondering if Jamie is flirting with her.

“I think that’d be a losing deal on my end,” she responds, pursuing her lips and hoping the warmth she feels spreading to her neck and cheeks is not visible to the shorter woman.

“I’m Jamie.”

Jamie is green eyes and – despite the cool fall air – warm, firm hands. And Dani knows she’s been starring a second too long for her intentions to be purely innocent.

“I know.” The words tumble out and she bites her lip when Jamie smiles, “I’m-”

“Dani,” Jamie finishes for her, “I know.”

Dani is sure Jamie can see the blush on her cheeks.

././

Jamie knows she’s been holding Dani’s hand for a little too long but Dani has either not noticed or she doesn’t mind. She doesn’t want to get her hopes up because Dani, in her purple sweater and scrunchie to match, looks like she belongs in a Monterey mansion in the hills.

Still, she swears she can see blush forming on the woman’s cheeks.

“Miss Clayton, when can we see the little animals?” One of the children yells through the open school bus window and the moment is broken.

Dani jumps slightly and clears her throat.

“Very soon, love.” Jamie answers for her and the children on the bus cheer. 

“I should –” Dani mutters, pointing to the bus and turning back to instruct the children to grab their bags and line up in single fashion outside.

././.

After the children, parents, and teachers are shown their cabin, Dani and Hannah bring them to the picnic area to eat their snacks and be introduced to their ranger and cook for the week.

“This is Jamie, she will be our trusted guide this week.” Dani says introducing Jamie to her class of fourth graders.

“Thank you, Miss Clayton,” Jamie says tipping her hat playfully before motioning to Hannah’s friend, “And this is Owen – he’s the one who will be feeding you wee gremlins this week.” The kids laugh as Owen waves his wooden spoon in greeting.

“Might even join you on a couple walks in the woods, if you don’t mind.” He adds giving the children a wink but from the way his gaze flickers to Hannah, Dani can tell it’s for her benefit.

“Today, we will be going on our first nature walk but before we do, we have to set some ground rules to make sure you and my forest friends are safe, deal?” Jamie prompts them.

“Deal,” the chorus of voices ring out as the children nod their heads in agreement.

“Many animals call this park home. Remember: you are a guest in their home so please remember to be respectful. There are not many places like this left on Earth.”

Dani sees the sadness flash in Jamie’s eyes as she bites the inside of her cheek.

“What kind of animals?” Flora asks, hand shooting up after the words have already left her mouth.

“I am glad you asked! Chipmunks. Weasels. Turkeys. Otters. Sea lions. Coyotes. Bobcats. And..” Jamie pauses for effect, the children at the edges of their seats. “Mountain lions!”

The children gasp as Owen roars for effect, and Jamie laughs. It's light. And Dani thinks she could get used to this. 

“Sharks too,” Jamie adds as some of the kids cover their mouths in shock.

“But you have my word no animal will hurt you so as long as you stay close to me, you got that?”

The children nod, the admiration clear in their eyes. They look at her in wonder. Like she could protect them from the most dangerous things in the world. Little do they know, not even the deadliest of animals are among the scariest things on Earth.

Though she’d never admit it, Dani herself felt uneasy about the night hike schedule in the coming days but now, in the presence of Jamie, she no longer felt the same fear.

“I have one more thing to tell you and then we can be on our way,” she pauses, making sure she has their undivided attention: “Leave it as it is. That is perhaps the most important piece of advice I can give you. It is true in this park and it is true in every wild place you visit. Leave it as it is.”

The children nod, reverence in their eyes.

“Repeat after me.”

And they do.

All the kids repeat the mantra.

././.

With Hannah offering to take the back with Owen, who decided to tag along for their first hike, Dani is free to walk alongside Jamie in the front. Today's hike is more of a walk but the paved trail leads them through dense forest.

The colors are striking. The trees red, canopy and block out the sun while the green ferns crowd the forest floor. Growing up in Pennsylvania, there were mountains, but nothing like this. Nothing straight out of Jurassic Park.

Jamie is gracious and she answers any and all the questions the kids have.

_What kind of sharks?_

“Basking sharks. Leopard sharks. Even Great Whites.”

 _Do mountains lions come out during the day?_

“They usually only come out during the mornings and evenings. And they don’t like big groups of people.”

_What are all these tall trees?_

“Redwoods. They’re the tallest trees in the world.”

“How old are they?” The next question is Dani’s. It escapes her lips before she can stop herself. Since they started their hike, there have been three things on her mind. Ensuring her kids don’t not run off, Jamie, and the towering giants among them.

“Redwoods have been on Earth for 240 million years. These in particular are a part of one of the few remaining old-growth forest. They’re hundreds of years old.”

“Wow,” is all Dani can muster.

“But the oldest known redwood lived to be 3,500 years old.”

The children are shaking their heads in disbelief but all Dani can do is look at Jamie.

“What would a person do with all that time?” she wonders aloud and the park ranger stops walking. Her brow scrunches and her lips begin to form words but nothing comes out.

././.

Suffice it to say, Jamie is caught off guard by the question. And realizes her initial assessment of Dani may have given her too little credit. No one has ever asked her that before. 

There’s no time to answer, let alone think about a monumental question like that, because suddenly Jamie sees two shapes fluttering about in the bushes ahead. She remembers why she’s here and quickly raises her hand in the air, fist open. It means stay silent and the kids oblige immediately.

She turns to the group, finger to her lips, before pointing to the flowers just ahead.

“Hummingbirds,” she whispers and motion for the kids to step forward. Two of them. One yellow, the other green – their wings beating so quickly you can barely see them.

Dani looks just as in awe as the rest of the children. She keeps her distance, allowing them a closer look before once again turning to Jamie and whispering: “I’ve never seen one before.”

It’s a beautiful thing, to share a smile over the beauty of life's creations. Knowing its Dani's first time makes it all the more special. Looking at her now, that’s when Jamie realizes Dani gets it.

“This part right here,” Jamie says, motioning to the children now huddled around the bushes: “This part is my favorite.”

“Which part?” She feels Dani’s eyes on her face and is keenly aware of just how close they are standing.

“The part when their eyes light up in understanding.”

“Understanding of what?” Dani is leaning forward, their shoulders touching. 

“That this is worth protecting.”


	2. Bonfire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay! After all the kind comments, I wanted to make this perfect. It's not... but I want y'all to know that I am extremely grateful and for that, here is a long, long chapter. Next one should be up this weekend. 
> 
> Also, in all actuality, Dani probably wouldn't walk the 4ish miles from the campgrounds to the beach but for the sake of this story, we're going to pretend everything is much closer together. And finally, just as a disclaimer: there is some light drug use in this chapter. Thank you for reading. 
> 
> Al.

Dani wakes up early the next morning, much earlier than usual. 

She closes her eyes and tries to fall back asleep but sleep refuses to come. She leans over quietly as to not wake Hannah who is fast asleep in the bed next to hers, and grabs her phone off the bedside table.

5:30am.

She could keep trying to fall asleep but considering that hasn’t worked for the last however long it has been, she decides to take advantage of being here and go for a walk. She grabs the map Jamie left and using the light of her phone, finds they’re just a couple hundred feet away from the beach, which Jamie so kindly circled after mentioning it was one of her favorite spots. 

She tells herself she’s not going _looking_ for Jamie but if she does so happen to run into her, she'll be pleasantly surprised. 

Putting on a cozy hoodie and pulling her long, white socks over her leggings, she quietly slips out of the cabin. It's still dark out, so dark that some of the stars remain visible in the night sky. When the cold wind hits her, she zips up and picks up speed. Walking through the doors of the main lodge, she doesn't see a soul. Assuming that means the kitchen is hours from opening, she locates the coffee vending machine and is about to slip in a dollar when she hears, "Hey!"

She turns around to see none other than Owen standing in the wooden doorway leading to the dining hall. He’s chipper, probably one of those morning people she keeps hearing about, and his apron is already dirty with what looks like flour.

“Hey,” she replies, his slightly disheveled sight bringing a smile to her face. 

“Are you looking for Jamie?” He grins, hands on his hips, but doesn’t give her the opportunity to answer before he's saying, “Wait here.”

A deer caught in headlights. That's how she feels right now. 

She wasn’t. 

Well, not technically. 

She's not that obvious, is she?

Ok, so maybe, if she’s really being honest, she got out of bed knowing her chance of running into Jamie would be greater outside the cabin. She had spent all night thinking about her, agonizing over her red lips and green eyes, but there is no way Owen could have known that.

He’s back within seconds, holding two to go cups. He hands them to her then disappears back to what Dani assumes is the kitchen. He comes back holding a brown paper bag.

“Coffee for you, tea for her. And some breakfast. She’s at the beach. Could you bring this to her?”

“I – yes.”

“Thanks love. She’s always forgetting to eat.” He says as if Dani is doing him a favor, and gives her what she can only describe as a mischievous grin before turning on his heel.

As she walks away, still stunned by what just transpired, she has a feeling maybe she’s the one who should be thanking Owen.

././

Not many people catch Jamie’s eye. She supposes that’s by design. She chooses not to make room for others. She’s happy with her life the way it is. She’s found purpose and she’s surrounded by beauty everywhere she turns. And in a way, it's hers.

It’s hard to meet new people when you live in the middle of a forest. Her and Owen are close, have been since Jamie started working at the park. They watch movies together and have game nights, smoke joints on the beach and chat for hours. She loves him. And because of that, she knows he loves Hannah. She sees what's blossoming between them, even if neither of them are ready to admit it. 

If she's being honest, she really hopes they get around to it soon because she's tired of being in the middle of all their sexual tension.

But Hannah, like her, puts up walls. 

Jamie hasn't been the romantic type in a long time, maybe ever, but looking at the two of them, it doesn't repulse her. She hadn't thought about another person in that way for a long time. And yet, sitting in the sand, she found her thoughts drifting to a certain teacher. 

Dani with her soft blonde hair and her nervous hands had invaded her thoughts. 

She was getting ahead of herself.

For Christ sake, she doesn’t even know Dani. Didn't know if she was even interested in women. All she knows is that Dani is darn good looking. And that she adores the Redwoods. And that she traces her eyebrow with the tips of her fingers when she's nervous. 

Jamie also thinks Dani might be nervous around her a lot. 

It’s early, too early for her to bother responding when she hears someone clearing their throat behind her. She feels annoyance boiling in her chest but she pushes it down, calling out over her shoulder without looking back: "The on-duty rangers are in the lodge." This is her time. 

“Oh uh—”

She recognizes the fumbling, loss of words immediately and stands up quickly, turning around to see none other than Dani holding a brown paper bag and two cups. Her face has fallen and it looks like she’s about to apologize before Jamie reaches out for the cup that has ‘tea’ with a little heart neatly scribbled on it.

Owen.

Of course Owen put her up to this.

She’ll kill him.

It was like him to gently push her toward new people, women, specifically but this was his most blatant and unabashed play yet. But Dani is here and she is smiling shyly, and Jamie supposes she'll have to swallow her pride and thank Owen for this at some point. 

“Would you like to sit?” She asks, pointing to the blanket laid out on the sand. There’s room for two and when she sees Dani bite her lip, no doubt wondering if she’s intruding because that’s the kind of considerate or perhaps insecure person Jamie thinks Dani is, she adds: “I only offer because your company ain’t complete shite.”

Dani rolls her eyes playfully at her sarcasm but Jamie's response seems good enough for her because she sits down and says: “I couldn’t sleep so I thought I’d go for a walk. Found Owen and breakfast.”

“Well, let’s see what we have here then,” Jamie says, pulling out two bananas, sliced apples, peanut butter, and two croissants, “No wonder every girl is mad for him.”

Jamie says it on purpose, trying to gauge Dani's reaction. 

“He's sweet.” Dani agrees before adding, “Hannah seems to like him.”

“They like each other. Have for months.”

“What’s stopping them?” Dani doesn’t mean to pry but she'd have to be blind not to notice the way they dance around each other. 

“Walls.”

Dani nods. She understands walls. Has built them up herself. For her own protection. But as time has gone on, she’s learning more and more that walls, even the ones that keep you safe, also keep you locked away.

“They don’t just keep others out, you know.” She adds quietly and Jamie’s heart hurts for her as she wonders what could have forced this gentle soul to lock herself away.

Perhaps they’ve both built up walls. Walls that have been weathered by storms. Overgrown. The kind of walls that are ready to crumble.

“I know.” Jamie finally says because she does know. And maybe admitting it is the first step to bringing some of those walls down and maybe Dani knows it too because she gives her a nod, and the kind of sad smile that only two people who have been broken can share. 

It’s an intimate moment. One that usually would make Jamie uncomfortable but the silence between them is anything but.

“There’s nothing quite like this in Pennsylvania.” Dani finally says, nibbling her apple, and watching a flock of pelican dive down to the ocean. With the sleeve of her sweater pulled over her fingers, and her nose red from the cold, Dani looks absolutely endearing. And Jamie has to fight the urge to scoot closer.

“I’d imagine not. Are you new to California?” She asks, grateful for a moment free of distraction, and for the absence of children, to finally delve deeper into Dani Clayton.

“Guilty. What about you?”

“Is it the accent that gave it away?”

“Might be.” Dani's tone teasing. 

She could leave it there but Dani has offered something, something small, but something personal nonetheless. Fuck it, she thinks. 

“Been here a couple years now. Was born in a small town in England, dad worked in a coal mine, mom wasn’t ready to be a mom so as soon as I could I moved to London. I had a rough time of it and after I got into some trouble with the law, I decided to start fresh. I always loved plants and the outdoors so I decided to come to the land of eternal sun.” She gives more than she's given to anyone new in years. 

“I think that’s Florida,” Dani says lightly before her face turns more serious. Jamie watches as she slips off her shoes and she brings her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them: “Guess we both came here to escape from one thing or another.”

Even Dani looks surprised by her statement. Unsure where it came from – the truth.

“What are you running from?”

“I had a fiancé.” Dani's voice shakes and Jamie tries to hide her disappointment, her eyes darting back to the water. Dani must notice because she continues quickly: “I grew up in one of those small American towns where everyone knows each other. The kind where being… different is still frowned upon.”

Jamie looks back then, her eyes clouded with confusion and concern now lighting up in some sort of understanding at what Dani may be hinting at. 

“My dad died when I was 10 and my mom kind of lost it after that. I didn’t have anyone else and his family was there.” How different her life might have been had she never lost her father. Had her mother never taken up drinking. Had she grown up somewhere else. Had she grown up here.

It’s heavy, especially heavy for a beautiful, sunny morning but Jamie doesn't mind heavy because she knows heavy. She wouldn't have guessed and certainly did not expect there to be so many similarities between them and their upbringing, or rather lack thereof.

She wonders what Dani's confession may mean for them and though she tries to suppress it, hope is a powerful thing and blossoms in her chest. But Dani looks tired, looks like she's been running for a very long time. 

“You’ve come to the right place." Jamie says but what she wants to tell Dani is that it's alright to slow down now. That she's safe here. That she can stop running altogether. Instead she lightly adds: "It’s hard to despair with views like these, eh?” 

"To new beginnings." The park ranger says, raising her cup and Dani smiles, finally, and clinks the two together. 

It certainly does feel like the start of something.

What exactly, neither is sure yet.

././.

They part for several hours so Jamie can clean up some foliage and Dani can help the kids get ready for their day. The morning drags on but at some point Hannah points out that she's beaming and Dani doesn't think anyone has ever said that to her, not even during her engagement party. She blushes and offers up some excuse about getting sun this morning. 

Hannah lets it go but Dani swears she sees her smirk once the class meets up with Jamie. 

After a short walk, they sit in the grass, gathering around Jamie to learn about the different species of tree, animal, and fauna found in Big Sur and California. 

Jamie is confident in her element and there are few things more attractive than watching someone do something they love. She doesn't mind the view one bit and hangs off Jamie's words like the rest of her kids do. All is calm as Jamie lectures on until Flora squeals. 

“Look!” She points and from beyond the tree line, just a couple steps away from them, two deer emerge. A mother and a baby. With little white dots on its back, the little one can’t be more than a couple months old. 

“It’s hurt.” Flora says, her voice falling and Dani’s eyes drift to its leg. Around it is a barbed wire digging into its flesh. The mother lets out a wail but she doesn't move. She's waiting for something.

Someone, Dani realizes. 

“I’m going to need everyone to stay very, very still.” Jamie says, putting down some of the diagrams she was holding up. With her hands up hoisted in the air where the mama deer can see them, Jamie takes slow steps toward the pair.

Dani holds her breath. 

One of her kids squirms, accidentally cracking a twig and the doe retreats slightly, startled. Jamie grimaces but says nothing, soothing the deer by offering words of comfort: “It’s alright. I’m going to help you and your baby, ok? Trust me. Trust me. Trust me.”

As Jamie gets close, the doe holds still, refusing to leave behind her fawn.

She knows, Dani realizes.

She knows Jamie can help her. That’s why she’s come here. And the knowledge is almost too much for Dani. 

Carefully, Jamie slides her hand into her pocket and pulls out a switch blade the size of her hand. When the light reflects off the knife and catches the mama deer’s eye, she grunts and stamps her hoof dangerously. 

“Woah, woah. There’s no need to charge me in front of all these kids.” Jamie says quietly to the deer, kneeling slowly and looping an arm around the baby's body to get a grasp on its leg. The baby thrashes slightly, trying to break free from Jamie's grip but she holds firm, her eyes never leaving the mom's. 

The baby cries out as Jamie uses her other hand to slips the knife between its flesh and the wire, cutting it with one smooth slice. She inspects the wound closely and then lets the baby deer go. The mother doesn’t move for a second, maintaining eye contact with Jamie even after the ranger has let go of the fawn.

It feels like something transpires between them because Jamie nods slowly.

Satisfied and free from pain, the baby gallops back into the woods and the mother follows suit.

It’s only the sound of clapping that brings Dani out of her thoughts. The children are clapping for Jamie. She waves them off, tries to shrug it off but she must know she’s their hero now.

And Dani tells her as much.

It’s satisfying to see blush slowly creeping onto Jamie’s cheeks. And Dani is old enough and knows herself well enough to realize what’s happening. She’s too far gone to stop it anyway. And for the first time in her life, she feels like she doesn’t have to.

She knows Hannah is smirking now. She doesn't mention Jamie's heroism but she does say: "There's a bonfire later and we're going."

././.

Once the kids are tucked away for the night and the parent volunteers have taken over, Dani wanders out of their living quarters to find Jamie and the rest of the gang. This time intentionally. 

There are quite a few people outside already and Dani recognizes the other teachers, many of them drink in hand, some of them fawning over the park rangers. A couple of them even wave to her as she passes by.

“Can I get you a drink?” Suddenly there’s a man in front of her, his teeth gleaming in the fire. He’s one of the rangers, Dani’s sure of it, because she's certainly never seen him at school. He looks familiar though and she puts two and two together that it's because he was in the parking lot yesterday. 

He’s tall, imposing. And as he waits for her response, something flashes in his eyes, something dangerous and suddenly Dani feels the urge to get out of this situation as fast as possible. No better time than the present. She's about to say it. What she's said to herself in the mirror over and over again until it sounded normal, then lost meaning the more she said it. 

“I’m g-”

“Oi, Peter. Buzz off will you?” She hears a booming voice from behind him and peers over his shoulder to see Jamie, sitting around a small fire with Hannah and Owen, waving her over.

It was phrased as a question but Jamie is on her feet now, starring down Peter from a distance. Her teeth are clenched and there’s no semblance of a smile on her face. She looks more serious than Dani has ever seen her.

The man in front of her seems to think for a minute before grunting a “whatever” and giving her a curt nod, no doubt wandering off to find another woman to corner.

She can’t help but wonder if Jamie was jealous or if she was just doing her fellow woman a favor.

“That one is bad news, let me tell you.” She says once Dani makes her way over. With Owen and Hannah sharing a blanket on one of the benches, Dani has two choices: sit next to Jamie on the bench opposite them, or take the more neutral stump to the side. She feels their eyes on her. Her indecision clearly the subject of analysis.

After this morning, Dani feels bold. More than that though, she feels a pull towards Jamie. A pull she's felt before but always written off, pushed off for the next time and the next time. She sits on the bench, close enough to Jamie that their knees might touch when they laugh. If only Jamie were to spread out just a little bit more. 

“There you are.” Jamie says softly, untucking her blanket and throwing it over Dani’s legs. She mutters a soft ‘thank you’ and does not regret her decision one bit. 

“Thanks for the save, by the way.” Dani says, “He’s… not my type.” Dani hopes Jamie is picking up what she’s putting down. She's leaving crumbs, she knows, but it's a process and she's been working up the courage for years. 

“Who knew.” 

With everyone off the clock, Dani, Hannah, and just about everyone else lets loose. Music is playing and liquor is flowing. People are dancing, and Dani is sure she's seen at least two of her coworkers locked in heated embraces with some of the parks staff. It reminds her of college, in a way, but much better. 

“Is it like this every year?” She wonders aloud. 

“Couple times a year.” Jamie and Owen confirm in unison.

“However, Jamie and I are always on our best behavior. Scouts honor.” He says and they smirk at each other over the fire.

“Oh, I very much doubt that.” Hannah teases.

“I reject that notion, Miss Grose. We are professionals through and through,” Jamie says, eliciting a laugh from the couple before adding: “Besides, ever since this one met you, he’s been quite boring.”

Owen rubs the back of his neck and Hannah blushes profusely, brushing it off in only the way Hannah can.

Walls.

Perhaps they all have that in common.

././

When they've gone through their 12 pack, Jamie offers to get them a bottle of wine she's saved for this very occasion, and a special surprise. 

Dani feels deliciously warm and a little woozy and she wants to offer to come with Jamie. Craves alone time with her. But she bites her tongue to keep from asking. Not yet, a little voice says. 

"Be right back." As Jamie stands, the blanket falls off their lap and Dani shivers in response. The other woman must have noticed because she picks up the blanket and wraps it around Dani's shoulders. It's sweet and Dani makes a thin line with her mouth trying to bite back the smile while Owen and Hannah give them a knowing look. They launch into a discussion of a book Dani has not read and though they try to include her, her mind wanders. 

As promised, Jamie is quick.. As soon as she disappears into the darkness, she returns. She's stopped by a woman who Dani would recognize from a mile away - Bella, who teachers just down the hall from her. 

She can’t hear what’s being said but she doesn’t need to because Bella’s body language says it all. Bella, who's never mentioned nor shown an interest in women, is making a pass at Jamie. She places a hand on Jamie's shoulder and squeezes. 

Dani kicks herself. She should have been more clear about her intentions. Instead of making a move, she was busy telling Jamie about her male fiancé. She should have considered the possibility that other people might find Jamie alluring too and that, unlike her, they wouldn’t be shy about it. 

Jamie is out of her rangers uniform tonight. She's wearing overalls that hug her body in all the right places and with her oversized jacket hanging over her small frame, Dani thinks Jamie looks - dare she say it - cute. She smiles at the thought of Jamie protesting that characterization with faux disgust on her face. But secretly, Dani thinks she would like it. Because Dani thinks that inside, Jamie is probably just as soft as her. What other kind of person loves the redwood trees and the baby deer so deeply.

Dani sees Jamie shake her head slightly and look over Bella's shoulder, nodding in the group's direction. Bella looks over, eyes meeting Dani’s and the blonde drops her gaze quickly, turning back to the fire. She's done looking, she's decided. She hopes that Jamie doesn't invite her over, prays to whatever deity may or may not exist that Jamie doesn't decide to call it a night either. 

It’s all white noise until she hears footsteps approaching.

One pair, not two.

She breaths a sigh of relief when she see Jamie, alone. She bites her lip to keep the smile from spreading on her face and lifts the blanket for Jamie to slide under. 

“What was that about?” Hannah is the one to ask.

“She’s just drunk is all.” Jamie shrugs it off and does not elaborate further.

././.

Perhaps another bottle of wine isn’t the best idea but Jamie rarely has this much fun. And what better occasion than hell week to break out her favorite bottle of Malbec.

She grabs one more thing from her bedside jar and heads back. Her strides are long, fast because if she's being honest, she's impatient. She wants to get back to Dani, and her friends, as quickly as possible. She’d hate for Peter – or anyone else for that matter – to get any more bright ideas.

The longer she spends around Dani, the more she wants to be around Dani. The more she wants to let her in. She’s not sure anyone has ever really seen her. Maybe Owen, maybe Hannah. Parts of her. But she knows she keeps a lot hidden, which makes her not the easiest person to get to know. 

Walls. 

She thinks Dani has been hinting at an interest in women, but she can’t be sure. She hasn’t said it out loud and part of Jamie thinks that maybe she's too old to be playing guessing games. She doesn't want to have to wonder or to be another trial run. But Dani is genuine and fragile. And maybe, because she sees how hard it is for her, Jamie cannot bring herself to write her off. 

She's just steps from Dani, is literally looking at Dani, when a tall woman with dark hair and red lipstick cuts her off. Jamie recognizes her from the year prior but cannot recall her name, or ever speaking to her for that matter. 

“I’ve been thinking about you since last year.” The woman says leaning into Jamie, her neckline dangerously low. She grabs Jamie’s arm, her fingers squeezing her shoulder.

“You’re drunk.” She replies, making a move to remove the woman’s now wandering hand from her jacket. If the slurring didn’t give her away, the smell of alcohol on her breath would have.

“At least I’m honest. And honestly speaking, I’m just looking for some no strings attached fun.”

“Look, you’re hot and I’m flattered, but I’m kind of in the middle of something.” She says, nodding in the direction of the fit pit where Owen, Hannah, and Dani sit. She grinds her teeth as the woman look over her shoulder to stare in the groups direction. Dani meets their gaze and quickly looks down, playing with her thumbs. With the teacher's head turned, however, Jamie takes the opportunity to slip away quietly. 

././

Dani doesn't dwell on the interaction long because Jamie is back and her knee is bumping against Dani's as she laughs at something Owen says - something Dani missed, being too distracted by Jamie's slight touch. It was an accident. Had to be. But, with Jamie shooting Bella down, Dani suddenly feels braver. 

The next time Jamie’s knee bumps against hers, Dani subtly spreads her legs ever so slightly to maintain contact. Jamie doesn’t move either and Dani catches her biting her lip from the corner of her eye. It's a small gesture but Dani knows Jamie is the kind of perceptive that notices small gestures and words unspoken. She nods along to the conversation at times, but she's no longer paying attention. 

The alcohol burning in her stomach gives her the courage she needs to test the waters further and spread her legs yet a little bit wider, touching her thigh to Jamie's. The shorter woman looks in Dani's direction with a raised brow but doesn't say anything. 

Doesn’t move her leg either.

They’re talking about a park ranger who used to work there. Rebecca. Her and Peter were a thing at one point and he demanded all her attention. They were a trio for a while until Peter got involved. He'd get mad at her for spending time with Jamie and Owen because he was worried they were both trying to steal her away from him.

He was right about one thing, they were trying to get her away from him, but not because either of them were in love with her. One night, Owen and Jamie came across them arguing. Peter had grabbed her by the arm and Owen and Jamie had to intervene.

Long story short, Owen ended up with a broken pair of glasses and Jamie a split lip. But the following morning, Rebecca quit and left the park. She told them she was moving to Southern California, that she had a cousin there who had room to spare.

She sends them a text here and there, but she hasn’t been back to the park since. They always felt it should have been him who left but he was so toxic he poisoned this place for her. 

The silence hangs in the air until Jamie breaks it. She doesn't like it for things to stay gloomy and Dani is growing to appreciate that. Whether it's an ability to compartmentalize or her life philosophy, Dan isn't sure yet. 

"You smoke?" She asks.

“Smoke what?” Dani responds and everyone laughs, even Hannah. She feels like she’s missed something until Jamie pulls out a joint from her pocket.

“You intend on sharing that, love?” Owen perks up.

“Do you even have to ask, love?” She replies sweetly.

“Well,” Owen pauses, ensuring his audience is paying attention, “I thought I’d… be blunt.”

Hannah hits Owen on the chest and Jamie mutters something that sounds like 'Not even a blunt, mate,' but they laugh.

The kind of laughter that keep on coming. 

“Cheers to being blunt,” Jamie’s eyes flicker to Dani as she brings the joint between her lips and lights it up. She inhales deeply, sighing as she slumps in her seat. “Boy, that really hits the spot.”

She hands it to Owen who takes a drag and passes it to Hannah who says coyly, "No, I couldn't."

“You can and you should,” Jamie counters. “One could say you even deserve to after a full day babysitting those little monsters.”

“Well, alright, if I must.” Hannah says somewhat dramatically, but she takes the joint expertly between her two fingers and brings it to her lips like Dani is sure she’s done hundreds of times before. Dani giggles. She knows she barely knows the other two people here, hell, barely really knows Hannah, but for the first time in months she feels like she has found friendship and community. 

When Hannah hands it to her, she watches the smoke billow and the flame slowly eat away at the neatly rolled paper. 

“What does it feel like?”

She’s never tried weed before. Eddie and his family were the type to raise their nose at recreational drug use but since she's been in California, where it's no longer a taboo topic, she's been curious. 

“I forget you’re new here,” Jamie chuckles.

“It doesn’t feel all that different at first.” Hannah replies pensively and Owen adds: “It feels sort of like time slows down.”

Hannah hums in agreement before laying her head down on Owen’s shoulder, her eyes beginning to look more and more droopy. Owen offers a goofy grin and takes off his glasses, folding them into his pocket and laying his head on top of Hannah's.

“It sort of feels like every feeling, every emotion, every sense is heightened.” Jamie leans over and adds quietly. Dani blinks, feeling Jamie’s breath on her neck.“You don’t have to.” Jamie adds, leaning back and leaving the choice entirely up to Dani who shrugs, thinks screw it, and takes a short pull. She fights the urge to cough but she doesn't feel any different.

So she takes another short puff and again, everything looks exactly the same. Until that is, she hears the ocean. With all the voices chattering about, she hadn’t noticed it before. She thinks she can even hear an owl in the distance. And the crickets.

She feels the warmth radiating from Jamie’s body.

Jamie’s knee on hers.

Jamie’s thigh too.

“Oh,” she finally says and everyone laughs but she doesn’t feel like the butt of a joke. It’s easy to assume good intentions here, with these people. It’s startling just how distant her old life feels now. Sometimes she wonders in disbelief how she wasted so many years being someone other than herself. Willing herself to love Eddie. She had been grateful for him and his family. And she had been young and impressionable. More importantly, she had been alone.

"Fancy a stroll?" Jamie asks and Dani traces all of Jamie's delicate features with her eyes because that's what she's decided Jamie is - delicate. 

“Yes.”

With Hannah's hand on Owen's thigh, she doesn't expect they'll be too concerned with their absence. 

Jamie smiles and stands up, offering Dani a hand and helping her up. Her palm is warm and soft and Dani considers not letting go, doesn’t want to let go, but then the choice isn't just up to her. Jamie lets her hand go, grabbing the remainder of the wine from the ground and waving Hannah and Owen goodbye. She leads them back to the beach, her hand bumping against Dani's the whole way there. The teacher does her best to summon the courage to reach out and take the ranger's hand. As soon as she makes up her mind but before she can will her body to move, Jamie is leaning down and spreading the blanket on the sand.

She kicks off her shoes and lays down, sighing loudly. 

They've come full circle. 

"Look up." 

And Dani, struggling to slow her racing heart, lays down next to her. 

././.

Dani's been scooting closer to her all night, Jamie thinks. She can't be sure and doesn't want to be wrong, but she's no where near drunk enough to be making it up entirely. The problem is that she's been trying _very_ hard not to have any expectations for a _very_ long time.

"I can't believe I'm here." Dani starts, "On the beach. In California, in the middle of the night. Doing drugs with a mysterious stranger." 

"You think I'm mysterious?"

Dani laughs and it's a beautiful sound. Jamie joins in until Dani turns her head to look at her through hooded eyes and says: "The thing is, you don't feel like a stranger and I feel more like myself tonight than I think I ever have before." 

It's then that Jamie feels Dani's fingertips brushing hers. They inch closer and closer until Dani's hand is tucked into hers.

Genuine, fragile, brave, Dani. Dani, who has the courage to grab her hand but not to see her reaction. Under the moonlight, Jamie can see the uncertainty painting her perfect features. It feels like the confirmation Jamie has been looking for and she squeezes Dani's hand lightly, intertwining their fingers, and hoping her assurances reaches the woman next to her. 

Several moments pass and Dani seems to have accepted that Jamie isn't going to pull away because she finally looks over and smiles. A real smile, the kind that reaches her eyes and crinkles her nose. Her eyes are free of conflict and she opens her mouth to say something, then closes it again. Jamie waits, ever patient. 

"I'm glad I'm here," she finally says, then bites her lip nervously and adds so softly that Jamie can barely hear: "With you." 

The crack is growing.

"I am too." 


End file.
